From High Brow Pirate to Hometown Pastor

I should have posted this weeks ago.  Banks.  So yeah, we got a bank account so that way when people write checks we can deposit them. Shop around on this one.

I was naive enough to think I could just walk into the bank with he lion as the symbol.  Why did I choose that one?  Well, they have a location down the street from me, down the street from where we meet and down the street from my treasurer.  How convenient is that?

Well, we went in there with all our paperwork and an initial deposit of $500.  Ready to sign up.  The bank manager sat us down and gave us an option with 250 free transactions per month and oodles of goodies and low fees and then when we are about to sign up he looks at us and asks,"So are just a church group or a full church?"

"We are a church," I replied.

"Oh, we cannot give you this one."

"Why?"

"Um, we got a memo about churches."

"So what can I get?"

"Um….this model here." He then shows me one for larger companies that has no free transactions, and higher monthly fees.

"But can other 501c3’s that are incorporated use the other one you just spent ten minutes showing me?"

"Yeah"

"But how come churches cannot?"

"We got a memo.  Not really sure why."

"Ah, very well.  So assuming we wanted to get this account here and pay you to let us have an account here…what do we do next?"

"I will need your drivers license and social security cards and $10 from each of you so we can run a credit check.  For churches you need to have a credit rating from every signer of at least 580 to have an account."

"Huh?  Why is that?"

"We got a memo."

"May I see this magic memo you speak so often of?"

"No."

"Have a nice day, we are going somewhere else."

So, 2 banks later we ended up choosing a bank we were comfortable with and had a reasonable fee structure.  It all came down to fees and friendliness at that point.  At none of the other banks were there mysterious memos and strange requests.  We were treated as any other small not for profit.  Shop around before you walk into the bank.

So, I was reading an article written by a friend today regarding church planting and he quoted stats from a report I sent him.  The report is a Church Plant Survivability Study and is actually quite interesting.  It is written by the North American Mission Board and can be found at http://www.namb.net/atf/cf/%7BCDA250E8-8866-4236-9A0C-C646DE153446%7D/RESEARCH_REPORT_SURVIVABILITY_HEALTH.PDF .

Anyway, I need to find someone who is a statistician that can see what our odds are as we defy them.  Here are some things I find interesting.

In year one the average attendance is 40…so far we are at an average of 25, but I am not about numbers.

In year one there are ten baptism…so far I got zero.  Too cold.

7% of churches start in community centers like I am using.

4% start on what we could loosely call a emergent model-which is closest to what I am though I do not do labels.

45% rely almost entirely on word of mouth.  That would be us.

61% have a parent church…that would be us.

80% of those sponsored churches get funds from the parent church, we are in the other 20%.

37% of those sponsored churches get lay people from the other church to help, we are in the other 63%.

28% get the parent pastor to speak…not yet, but we are only 3 weeks in.

61% of the pastors have an undergrad degree.  Check!

56% of the pastors have a masters.  Nope!

Average funding from a parent church or denom is 35k the first year.  Ours is zero.

Average tithe from congregation the first year is 40k a year.  It remains to be seen what ours is, but I suspect we will have 25-33 percent of that. 

10% of the pastors do not get paid…that’s me.  

30% are self sufficient the first year.  Um…that is us.

Discipleship training increases odds of survival by 250%-we are working on that.

Planter team meetings at least once a month-135%-we got that.

Stewardship planning-178%-well, we got a budget and try to give a bunch of it away (most of it) so yeah.

So…are we against the odds or not?  I dunno.  Stats and numbers are all crap according to Penn and Teller.  

In week 2 of this madcap journey of starting a church I had to preach 3 services.  This is getting to be a habit.  Next week I am preaching 2 services.  Only one is my community, but the other communities are nice.

Anyway, the first service was a very liturgical service and it was fun to wear the stole for my UCC neighbors and preach and serve them their communion, the second service was a contemporary one and having cut my teeth in evangelical culture, it was like wearing an old shoe.  But then came the third service.  

It was a pot luck.  No music, no program, no order of service.  Just people eating food and getting to know each other.  Then, after a point, I broke out the elements of communion and explained that communion happens during a meal and that when Jesus told us to do this in remembrance of him, perhaps it was more than a bit of bread and wine…maybe we are God’s hands and feet and maybe we need to find ways to be broken and poured for each other and others in this new humanity we embrace.  It was a moment filled with beauty and love and a young man nicknamed curly with facial piercings and baggy pants said it best.  It was like the beginning fo family and less like church and more like sitting around a camp fire.  What curly grasped is what community should be and I learned something from his perspective and unbridled enthusiasm by what he saw and felt that day.

Among other things, I am a fan of a little known show called Firefly. 

The lyrics from my fav show go like this:

Take my love, take my land
Take me where I cannot stand
I don’t care, I’m still free
You can’t take the sky from me.

And you can’t take the sky from me.

If you follow the show and get to know the characters, you learn that this song reflects well a batch of downtrodden people living life on the ragged edge together despite hurdles, trials, and past horrors.  

Today, this reflects my mood on things.  For those not in the know due to my long silence here is where we stand.  In the numbers side we are averaging about 25 a week, and they are giving enough for us to make our expenses and help a few people.  And help we are doing.  4 boxes of clothing went to a homeless shelter run by a friend of mine.  This friend  does not get a lot of support even in the time of the holidays.  Everyone knows about the Salvation Army, Habitat for Humanity, Operation Christmas and so forth.  But a little group of people offering transitional housing to homeless couples and homeless with children in a small suburb?  Not so much.  Since this is transitional housing and not a nightly shelter, they get to know and develop relationships with the  people that stay in the house with them.  So Pastor Justin updates us on the stories of someone who has gotten a nice coat for the first time in years, a few changes of clothes, toys for their kids, and even a new toothbrush (you can pack a lot in 4 moving boxes).  This week, a small team of folks are out Christmas shopping for a family we know (that does not attend our church, but that does not matter).  In this family you have mom and dad and 3 kids.  Mom is five years younger than me and has cancer.  Mom is losing the battle and it has been an expensive one.  They do the best they can to pay the bills.  Christmas is not gonna be merry for this family.  So, for one day, they will be showered with presents, have dinner bought for them, and more importantly…know they are loved.  One day where life is not dark and scary.  In a life where every day matters and is a gift, that one day can mean a lot.  

Now, I know that there are other communities and bodies that do a lot more than we do and I also know they are doing them to reach more people.  But bear with me.

Underneath it all is a spirit.  As these people who only met a few scant weeks ago catch this fire in my belly of mercy and justice and love, they are doing it for and to each other.  I am seeing a couple in our group touched by others as they find hope in the wake of an expensive civil court battle they lost.  They are not asking where is God because, even though they are down, they are showered with love and friends who are reminding them that-for better or for worse-it is over.  There are young adults who come because one of their friends from the Rocky Horror Picture Show crew sings and sets up for us.  They come and look at me and say,"I’ve not been to a church or sermon in ten years that I have liked.  I gave up on religion.  I like this.  This means something.  What can I do to help change the world?"  Now, maybe I should brag about conversions and alter calls to be a good little evangelical.  But a prayer at an alter is, at best, the beginning of awareness of a different journey.  End of the day, love needs to be felt and experienced before it can be explained.  This is not love with a hook, this is unconditional and real and of people’s own volition, they are willing to help each other and love each other and explore this thing a little deeper.  

New churches springing up are not doing as well as they used to.  But the magic number of outside support seems to be 20-30k a year.  We have zero financial support, extremely limited (but VERY appreciative) offers of support for things like use of a copier and dirt cheap rent, and to my knowledge, not a whole lot of peeps from other places that helped us morally on this journey roll up sleeves.  By all accounts and all statistics, bastard children like us should not have a prayer or statistical shot.  But here we are, in the black, shining a light and no one can take the sky from me.  

Me?  I am willing to die for this cause, these people, and this idea.  This journey for love consumes me and God has shown himself to us in the strangest of ways and with the little things that, if we are not paying attention, we just might miss.   

So the stated purpose of this Blog was to show the path from the inception of an idea to the birth of a church.  The lifecycle of the community and my observations as a pastor type guy are a completely different matter.

I only come here when I have a thought relevant to planting, but I still have a lot to say and observe and to speak about.

Maybe it is time to give a summary and start a new chapter in a new blog.

Unless someone disagrees, I think I will compile a summary of thoughts on this road.  This chapter is really over.  This community may live on for decades or years or a few more weeks…so though the story continues, the chapter is done.

What say you?

Ya know, I have written some outlandish things in this blog, but the hate mail I have gotten from the Steve Jobs one has me a little freaked.  I am ready to get a restraining order of protection from Pastors, man.  So, since I do not have ot hide in private emails, let me go after what I received a few hate emails on.  The bit about spending money on operational expenses. Guess what?  I ain’t apologizing cuz I am right.  It is wrong for us to squeeze every last dime out of our congregates and not hold ourselves accountable to the same legalism we dare to hold people to. 

Deut 26:12-15

When you have finished setting aside a tenth of all your produce in the third year, the year of the tithe, you shall give it to the Levite, the alien, the fatherless and the widow, so that they may eat in your towns and be satisfied. Then say to the LORD your God: "I have removed from my house the sacred portion and have given it to the Levite, the alien, the fatherless and the widow, according to all you commanded. I have not turned aside from your commands nor have I forgotten any of them. I have not eaten any of the sacred portion while I was in mourning, nor have I removed any of it while I was unclean, nor have I offered any of it to the dead. I have obeyed the LORD my God; I have done everything you commanded me. 15 Look down from heaven, your holy dwelling place, and bless your people Israel and the land you have given us as you promised on oath to our forefathers, a land flowing with milk and honey."

You ask me to understand the modern tradition of tithing as the income that supports the church and pays for your salary and benefits of the church workers, including pastors. But you refuse to see the much more beautiful and complex concept in ancient Israel.  When you can stop looking at your own self interests long enough to see how organically this passage hits on the themes that go throughout the Bible such as justice for the poor, the disenfranchised, and the marginalized, then I will listen to you. God holds us responsible to meet the needs of the others.  When the church leaders become proper stewards of the strorehouse…then…and ONLY then will we grasp the true meaning of the tithe….a beautiful and lovely expression of Love to God and to those who are without while surrounded by our abundance. This is worship, this is beauty, this is ministry….but if we do not do right by the money entrusted to us, then we are guilty of sin.  So rethink your spending before you squeeze your parishoners.  Are you allowing them to worship and serve others or are you secretly hording it to protect a building and your precious paycheck?  Weak, man.  Telling people to trust God and try the tithe when you don’t trust God to honor his storehouse and you reduce yourselves to robbing people the opportunity to worship God with their money.  Enjoy the warm night in your heated home, within 15 miles of your cozy pad with the flatscreen tv is a someone homeless and a likely a single mom with no heat wondering how she is gonna pay the rent.  Wanna know why she is scared and he is homeless?  You got their money.

Cheers!

"Do you want to sell sugar water for the rest of your life, or do you want to change the world?"  These famous words were uttered by Apple Co Founder Steve Jobs to then CEO of Pepsi John Sculley.  John was sitting tight in a nice job in a secure company raking in options and money that even in 1983 dollars, I will likely never see in my life.  John’s claim to fame was being the brainchild of the Pepsi Challenge ad campaign. 

Steve Jobs and the Woz birthed the Apple IIe.  Apple was successful and tapping into a new market, but at the time, they were no PepsiCo.  But that final challenge to John was what drove him to leave his safety and security and help change the world.  

At the end of the day, that is what Jesus is calling us to do.  We are to let the dead bury the dead, drop our fishing nets and follow him, pick up a cross and follow him, and essentially be broken and poured for other people.  There is no safety or security in answering this call.  There is no promise of cash, glory, safety, or security.  But we get to change the world. 

So I ask my fellow pastors with 80% or more of your tithes going into operating expenses, my fellow neighbors in homes of comfort and debt, my friends who value (like me) safety and security and a glimpse of tomorrow….do you wanna sell sugar water…or do you wanna change the world.  Invite me to change the world with you and I will come.  

I’ve been invited to Haiti, I go to Haiti.  I’ve been invited to the east side of Joliet to feed people, I go.  I have been invited to coffeehouse to make a difference in the lives of kids, I go.  I’ve been invited to a fair trade event, I’m going.  I’ve been invited to go start a community, I go.  I go becuase we can change the world.  I’ve invited you to do the same.  This is good.  

 I’ll take that over a wicked cool party with lots of sugar water any day.  Don’t try to sell me sugar water.  Invite me to change the world.

Okay.  I have had a nights sleep and I realize that in my eagerness to tell everyone how it went, I missed a big element.  Here, via email, and on facebook I am hearing one simple question:  How do you feel!  I did not intend to avoid the question.  But I think the absence of the answer to that is complicated.  But it boils down to I did not know how I felt yesterday.  Not for any insidious reason, but for the reason that my brain and emotions were too spent for me to give a real answer.  In many ways I am still sorting out all my emotions and at the same time trying to fast forward through all the eventualities. There is an irony in my choosing the song title from Superstar for my entry.  The lyrics are telling at the beginning and I did not think about it.

APOSTLES

What’s the buzz?
Tell me what’s a-happening.

JESUS

Why should you want to know?
Don’t you mind about the future?
Don’t you try to think ahead?
Save tomorrow for tomorrow;
Think about today instead.

APOSTLES

What’s the buzz?
Tell me what’s happening.

JESUS

I could give you facts and figures.
Even give you plans and forecasts.
Even tell you where I’m going.

So with that in mind, I am going to forget about the future, facts and figures, and plans and forecasts (is it bad that I gained wisdom from a fictional Andrew Lloyd Webber version of Jesus as seen through the eyes of Judas????) and focus on today.  Today, right here, right now, I feel wonderful about what happened yesterday.  What I feel good about is not numbers, style of music, worship, prayer, or sermonizing.  I feel good about what can best be described as glimpses and emotions and spirit of community.  Something good happened. 

Some of these people who are connected solely to me met for the first time today.  Many of them have sat at the same table with me at George’s Diner…but on different nights.  Some are not connected to me at all (until yesterday), but they were connected with other people I have sat at tables with at George’s.  It was fun watching people laughing and talking and their children running about as if they have grown up together when in actuality some met that day.  That part had me grinning ear to ear.  Why?  Because that is organic and real community and was not contrived by lighting, music, preaching, or programs.  It was organic.  It was one of those things that God and people do working together without the people even being aware of that symbiosis because they are living in a good moment. 

Something interesting happened at one point.  Everyone just kinda sat at one point and waited.  They were ready.  They had decided they were ready to sing and be a group.  They applauded the worship efforts of those and sang together and paid attention to the words of the spirit of the songs.  

The preaching.  I did use some of the things I prepared, but to be honest, I kinda ad libbed it because it just felt right in that moment to establish some things.  What I feel good about was that I not only used the passages in Amos, Isaiah, and Matthew to identify what if wrong with church today, but I was able to elaborate on WHY it is wrong.  Where I personally wish I had been stronger was when I spoke of the things that could be right about a community and how we intend to do that in a way, the line of how to get from a to b was not as clear.  However, I am not sure the world’s problems can be summarized in 15 minutes.  Also, while I spoke of the right things…I saw some people wiping tears from their eyes.  I have never in my life said anything that made someone cry besides-I’m breaking up with you or Your mom died or golly your fat and unattractive.

Afterwards I had some really good conversations with people looking for something like this and they are hoping this is what they are looking for.  I hope so to..not for numbers, but because of your heart meaning the world to me.

What was missing for me?  I am reticent to bring that up.  See, on Saturday I popped over there really quick and sat in the space alone and prayed.  I told God I was sorry for a great many things.  I begged God for his will to be done and begged him to make this real and not some whim of mine that would have been a year and half mistake and I walked in there on Sunday calm.  I say that because of a new found humility.  I am not saying I am without humility, but I found a new depth of it that I did not know was within me.  It’s like when you have a kid.  You discover fonts of love you did not know you had.  Or if you fall in love, you have the same result.  I suppose if you lose a child or a spouse you feel new pain.  There are moments you find a depth of emotion you did not know you had in you.  This new humility was one of those depths and it was good. 

Yeah yeah yeah!  I am stalling here.  All right, here goes.  I wanted the tables out with the chairs in a more organic fashion.  I did not this Sunday because I had NO idea how many people would show up.  I wanted as many chairs out there as possible.  Worship.  I need at least an overhead projector so people do not have to fumble for lyrics on sheets of paper.   And as I work through this worship issue I am having I need to chew on what the worship music portion was like. I also need to make for more interaction.   My gay friends blew me off.  They would have had safe harbor there, but maybe that would be hard to trust.  My college age people blew me off…and Dana too.  I thought I was building a better bridge over these social chasms…and maybe I have.  But the bridge needs to be tested a bit more so I suppose I will have to cross the bridge over the chasm and see what’s up. 

Though it would have been nice to come have lunch with people, it made my heart’s day that I visited some of the coffeehouse kids at the hospital.  Because in that moment I felt in my zone.  Being with people who are suffering and hurt and scared.  It was all part of the same church service for me.  It was worship for me and I hate that they are ill, but I am glad to be able to visit them without reservation and love them.  

So…ummmm…is that a better answer?

 I have no crystal ball, but I feel damn good and very hopeful.